Squirrel Terrorism Continues

In spite of the NSA’s massive spying effort, they never saw this one comin’.

Squirrel is caught eating chunks out of Florida family's car

A crazy car-eating squirrel with an appetite for destruction has been terrorizing a south Florida family.

The hungry critter — dubbed Munchy — has been biting fist-sized chunks of metal out of Nora Ziegler's SUV. It's already ripped two 6-inch panels out of her Toyota Sequoia and seems intent on eating more. […]

Cops were stumped and told her to remain vigilant, speculating that "someone was coming after her."

But she soon busted the culprit red-handed as she put out the trash one night.
Ziegler said she couldn't believe her eyes as she watched the squirrel, which was hanging by its teeth and gnawing away at the metal.

Relieved that she wasn't being targeted by hoodlums, she's now deciding what to do about the rampaging rodent.

What is it with Florida cops? If someone was comin’ after the poor woman, what good would they be? And what if she ended up shootin’ the squirrel when she discovered he was up to no good? Would EPA or PETA start rabble rousin’ until she was arrested and tried for third-degree animal cruelty for squirrelicide?

‘Round here she wouldn’t have to decide. We canines have our own version of Stand Your Ground involving lots ‘n lots of very sharp teeth.

posted by Harrison at 3:10 PM