Name:Harrison Location:United States

The Original Lovable Little Fuzzball

Here's the straight stuff.

The adventures of Harrison are true.
Try a few of his Crunchy Bites for a taste.
--Alpha Human Mom

Thursday, July 08, 2004

Tig Talkback

I have been meaning to get back to that Tig fe-lying for a while (and now I've lost the link), but you people haven't got a clue how tough it is for me to get at the computer. (AHM takes over and that's the end of that.) The hairball-on-the-bed comment Human Female Meryl just made reminded me. (Wears you down, doesn't it? Keeps you tired and off your guard for any future operations, that's the plan.)

Have fun at Busch Gardens--great place! Okay, so they didn't let me actually in the park (can't someone repeal that crappy rule?) but the kennel was pretty nice. We probably wouldn't have had much fun on the rides anyway--Heddy is such a wuss she would have ruined everything with her whimpering and whining and howling. (Sometimes I think she's a closet Demo-cat.)

Btw, if I had known HFM was going to be at Fort Lee for the Fourth, I would have insisted AHM drive us over there to discuss the issue. 'Course HFM was in the stands and no one lets me go there--tried a few years ago and ended up being stuck in AHM's friend's back yard instead. (Since Little Girl moved in, though, we mostly stay home and watch her have a nervous breakdown over the noise.)

Oh, and before I forget, Gracie looks like an almost-acceptable fe-lying. Probably drives all the guys crazy--unless--well, I won't go there… Glad she got her tuna treat. I'm partial to tuna myself.

Human Female Meryl should still keep a close eye on that Tig character, though. When I was a really young pup, Silly Human Female was AHM's roomie and we got stuck housing her fe-lying as part of the deal. It was a big, fat, hairy, tabby-colored Persian fe-lying that looked a lot like that Tig cat. (You all know Persia is now Iran, don'cha? Even the Arabs are scared of Persians! "The Iranians give paltry excuses, saying that the reactors produce cooking fuel and water reservoirs," [columnist Abdul Rahman] Al-Rashid writes [in the Arab News.] "We would be also stupid if it didn't occur to us that they were in fact producing nuclear bombs by which they can threaten neighboring countries.")

Okay, so Tig is a Maine Coon, but really, they could be brothers under the fur.

That Persian sucker was 27 pounds if he was an ounce--a mean-looking mug who the SHF had named "Dandylion." Yeah, yeah, that could explain the attitude problem I suppose. But he was still a full-blown terrorist. He would hide under a chair and wait for me to toddle past, then leap out for the attack. (Do those tactics sound familiar?) At the time I was all of about 5 pounds sopping wet so it was not a pleasant experience to be flattened by 27 pounds of cat-flab.

But he was dumb. Reeeally dumb. Didn't seem to know I would grow. I grew teeth too. Good thing for Dandylion he had 10 pounds of fur around his neck and AHM was close by when I finally took things into my own paws--er--jaws. Ever since I've been suspicious of all fat, fluffy, tabby-yellowish fe-lyings. You never know what underpawed scheme they're planning.

PS: No, I didn't wipe him out. He never came close enough again to give me a second shot.

PPS: You're welcome about the ducklings, HFM, and no, I didn't think you thought they were cat toys. Tig I'm not too sure about…

posted by Harrison at 12:23 PM


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