Rub-a-dub-a-dubby Ducky

Ya' know, AHM has a really--ah--odd sense of humor. She was laughin' about the story of the library flea market (and could we discuss that particular name, please?) sellin' "sex toys" on the local Presbyterian Church lawn.

Okay, it was a kinda' funny story, mainly because it happened in Tennessee. But, bein' Tennessee, they just couldn't leave it alone, even when they left it alone.

"[O]fficials in this Nashville suburb backed off from citing [Katherine] Williams [of Passions & Pleasures] for violating the city's sexually oriented business ordinance because she had already taken down her display by the time police responded to complaints Saturday. Nearby vendors also refused to be witnesses in the case.

[…]

"Williams said she'll be back at the flea market next year.

"If she does, she'll be cited into court," [City Administrator Ken] York said. "That duck is a sexual toy, and it was on display. That was a vibrator on display in public view."

Ever since she read that follow-up, AHM's been gigglin' and wanderin' around the house singin'. Now AHM is a pretty good singer--I mean, she used to do musical theater before she moved on to directin' and writin'. That's not the problem. It's the friggin' song.

Rubber Ducky.

To make things worse, she went out to the National Institutes of Health to find the music. Guess Mr. City Administrator York better ban Sesame Street from Tennessee airwaves or at least demand they get a "mature audiences" ratin'. This is real, hard-core stuff. Can FCC fines be far behind?

"Rubber Ducky, you're the one,
You make bathtime lots of fun,
Rubber Ducky, I'm awfully fond of you;

Woo woo be doo

Rubber Ducky, joy of joys,
When I squeeze you, you make noise!
Rubber Ducky, you're my very best friend, it's true!

Doo doo doo doo, doo doo

Every day when I
Make my way to the tubby
I find a little fella who's
Cute and yellow and chubby

Rub-a-dub-a-dubby!"

Oh yeah. I'm addin' that sucker to my Christmas Wish List.

posted by Harrison at 3:07 AM