Harrison
Name:Harrison Location:United States

The Original Lovable Little Fuzzball

Here's the straight stuff.


The adventures of Harrison are true.
Try a few of his Crunchy Bites for a taste.
--Alpha Human Mom





Tuesday, March 08, 2005


"The charge is prepar’d,…"

"…the lawyers are met,
The judges all ranged,—a terrible show!"*

While pawin' through my Blogroll, where I can safely roll without needin' a bath afterward (most times), I ran across an interestin' post by my buddy Sigmund. No, not the Sea Monster. I mean Sigmund, Carl, & Alfred. Not to slight you other guys--Carl or Alfred could have just as easily asked the questions dependin' upon what frame of mind he was in--they were in--oh, hell. Pick one.

Anyway, he/they wanna' know what we'd do if we were part of the last 100 people left on earth. "…you must believe that your actions will determine whether or not our species survives." (Guess the cockroaches--who seem to be able to survive anything--refused to cough up the answers and we're the alternatives.) And bein' a shrink or shrank or shrinkies (what is the plural of psychoanalyst anyway?) he/they will probably attach great meanin' to the answers, but so what. Here ya'll go.

First things first--no fe-lyings. Now that that's settled…

Continued in Read the Rest!



"What 3 books would you consider essential to have with you, to learn from and teach from, and to pass on?"

The Bible, 'cause whether you believe in it or not, it has a bunch of rules and other stuff we should know plus it shows the payback of igorin' and/or defyin' those rules--and I'm not talkin' a rolled up newspaper, here. (Can't say I'm too crazy about that dogs-lickin'-up-the-blood-of-Jezebel part, but the rest of it is pretty good.)

The Complete Works of Shakespeare. I like the way it sounds when I hear it--kinda' like music. Unless the person talkin' has a southern drawl. Then it's--well--let's just say it's not the same. Lots of modern writin' comes from ideas he had or things he said first 'cause he was writin' for his audience not a bunch of fe-lyin' NYT the-a-ter critics. Beside, his histories show the screw ups of out-of-control Alphas which is somethin' we should all learn about.

The New Way Things Work by David Macaulay 'cause you humans are gonna' have to figure out how to build new stuff, right?

"What form of government would you hope to establish, and why?"

A representative democracy which is what the best packs have. Yeah, you read that right. You humans may think we're a dictatorship, but you'd be wrong. Sure we've got an Alpha in charge but d'ya' know that could be a female as well as a male? More than you other Americans have done so far, eh? And if the Alpha screws up (like if we get a Demo-cat Hillary or somethin' like that in charge), the rest of the pack dumps 'em. (Okay, not always in the most civilzed manner, but cut us some slack for being canines.)

Now if ya' watch real close, you'll see the rest of the pack has various levels of bosses--beta down to omega--females, pups, companions of the alpha leader. And we all have our jobs--findin' a homestead, guardin', defendin', raisin' kids, gettin' food, etc. If we're livin' with humans we pretty much let them do the gettin' food part, though. 'Specially since every time we try to contribute they get all pissy and throw our "kill" into the trash.

"Would severe infractions that put the group in danger ever be dealt with by capital punishment? If so, for what infractions?"

See above re: "if the Alpha screws up..." Oh, all right. Deliberate murder would pretty much be the only killin' crime. Stealin', territory jumpin', tryin' to assassinate the Alpha--most of the time the cur is banished from the pack. They can start their own pack if they can, then come back and challenge the Alpha later, but I think we're gettin' into a foreign policy debate with that. Or maybe political parties and elections--tough to tell the difference sometimes.

Hope that answers your questions, Siggy. Oh, and this is just for you…



*The Beggar’s Opera Act 3 Scene 2



posted by Harrison at 12:37 AM


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