Star Light, Star Not-So-Bright
Yeah, you know how those E.T.s are, all cuddly cuteness until you run out of Reeses PiecesTM. Then they just give ya' the glowin' finger and take off for home.
Most parents figure at some point their pups aren't of this world (I know I did), and now there's proof. Kinda'. See, apparently some human Earth kids have been "seeded" with DNA from outer space visitors. Apparently their parents, on the other paw, have been "seeded" with gullibility from the Outer Limits.
And this guy's been on an extended deep space tour for the past four decades.
"Dr. Richard J. Boylan, Ph.D., MSW, M.S. Ed., B.A. Internationally-noted Researcher of UFOs/Star Visitors and of human Star Kids/Star Seed adults, Behavioral Scientist, Exo-Anthropologist, emeritus University Associate Professor of Psychology, Registered Social Worker, Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist, and Councillor.
"His career has spanned four decades of service as a social worker, psychologist (retired), clinical hypnotherapist, clergyman (retired), school administrator and clinic administrator. Dr. Boylan has served as a Lecturer at California State University, Sacramento, University of California, Davis, National University, Chapman University, and Sierra College."
Ye gods! Imagine how many people he's screwed up over that time, 'specially parents and educators who just can't handle kids bein'…well… kids! Oh, 'scuse me…Star Kids. Wanna' know if ya've got one? Just check out the convenient questionnaire. Pay particular attention to questions 52 and 53:
"52. The child is misunderstood by the school system, mislabeled “Attention Deficit Disorder” or “Learning Disability” (because s/he is bored, under-challenged, or put off by the “normal” children’s learning pace); or mislabeled “Hyperactivity Disorder” (because of fidgetiness in the classroom out of boredom, or because of their thoughts directed to more challenging subjects, or because the child is highly focused on a topic of interest and perseveres much longer than is considered “normal”); or mislabeled “Learning Disabled” (because s/he sees and points out the connections between the subject being taught and other subjects, (such as history-math-science-art connections) when the teacher only wants to hear about the one subject being taught.)"
You just know there's plenty of parents out there who refuse to discipline their kids then can't figure out why they're total pains in society's butt. Now they can say—Oooooo—my kiddies are special—they're Star Kids.
Here's another indicator they could be a "seeded" Star Kid:
"53. The child has experienced a “Walk-In” or replacement of the original human (dying) personality by a new (off-world) personality, which takes on the existing body and continues the life, having memory of earlier years but with different abilities and personality."
Ummmmm… It's called puberty, you idiot!
So some of you shrinks out there might one day find yourselves confrontin' a "seedier" protégée of the Star Nation Visitors—beings so overflowin' with the milk of human…er…alien kindness that, instead of just blastin' us to hell for bein' jerks, they're teachin' us to expand our consciousness and save Mother Earth (not to be confused with Mother Sheehan who's from another planet entirely).
If you do meet one, here's a handy dandy link where you can join the Academy of Clinical Close Encounter Therapists, Inc.. Quite an enlightened bunch. Too bad the bulb's burned out.
posted by Harrison at 10:03 PM