Seem Like Hard Times

Or not.

We've all read the stories 'bout families havin' to give up the family pet when they're forced to move outta' their homes. Tragic and traumatic. More so when ya' consider how much they probably wanted to keep their companions while these fools are worryin' 'bout their décor.

Thirty years on since the [Dogs Trust] charity made famous the trademarked slogan "A dog is for life not just for Christmas", people are dumping their pets for the flimsiest of reasons—even over the festive period.

Here's a few of their excuses:

"My dog doesn't match the sofa."

Let 'em sleep on the couch for a few weeks—they'll match then.

"My black dog doesn't match the new white carpet, can we swap him for a white dog?"

See above and tell everyone ya' got tweed carpetin'.

"My dog ate the Christmas turkey cooling on the work-top."

Provin' once again dogs are smarter than humans—and we really appreciate the dummies who leave a whole Christmas turkey unattended. Believe me, we'll figure out a way to get at it.

"My pet guinea pig got worried with a dog in the house."

Sounds like a Disney movie in the makin', big eyes 'n all.

"The dog opened all the presents on Christmas Eve."

Be thankful the dog didn't pee on 'em, which is what ya' deserve for bein' so…so…fe-lyin'!

More idiot reasons are in the article. Someone write a Dogs for Dummies manual now.

posted by Harrison at 8:43 AM