Evidence…

…of a fe-lying terrorist in training. Oh, it's passed off as a simple "game," but this gives everything away:

"[…] Put a rolled-up paper napkin in one of my sneakers. He likes to push it down to the toe and then pull it out again. Sometimes I have to shake out my sneakers and shoes before putting them on. I get surprised on a regular basis, because I usually don't bother to check to see if he's dropped cat toys in my sneakers."

Uh huh. Shove a rolled up napkin into a shoe then pull it out again. Clever fe-lying, lulling his bedazzled dupe into a state of cute-kitty euphoria. But you know he's working on the real thing. Just look at that face in the picture. And he's already secreting toys in the same shoes without warning. How soon before it's something else?

"[…] He also fetches. I throw the rolled-up napkin, he chases it, I say, "Bring it here," and he picks it up in his mouth and trots to my feet. Mostly. Sometimes he drops it six or seven feet away from me and still winds himself around my legs, expecting to be petted as his reward."

Eewwwww! He fetches? This fe-lying is really in deep cover. Must be planning something huge.

"That's the other neat thing about Tig. Every trick he does, he does only in the expectation of having a bellyrub or an ear-scratch."

Can those 72 kitty virgins be far behind?

"And boy, does he love having that belly rubbed. That's all I needed to do to teach him to stand up on his hind legs on command. Yes, really. Yes, I have a cat that stands up when I say "Up!"

What a hairball. We can only hope his scheme is uncovered in time to avoid…what? Keep those matches and lighters waaaaay up high in a locked cabinet, please.

posted by Harrison at 1:35 AM