Kennedy Whacks Away at Getting Down and Dirty
Every few days, Sen. Edward M. Kennedy can be seen on Capitol Hill hitting tennis balls to his Portuguese water dogs, Sunny and Splash. He typically does this on a grassy area near his office in the Russell Building or, if he has time before work, on a field near the entrance to the FDR Memorial.
That link's for the AKC site. They say there's two ways of grooming/clipping a PWD--or is it PAD--or WMD? Oh, nevermind. There's one way on their website and the other one is here. That second one is just embarrassing.
"Now whaddaya want, now whaddaya want?" the senator yells to Splash, playfully whacking him on the head. "Good boy, yes, yes -- g'boy, g'boy." Kennedy shouts -- if one can imagine this -- in an upper-crust New England dialect of canine baby talk. "Gimme the booolll now, gimme the booolll now."
"Whacking him on the head?" Has PETA heard about this? The ASPCA? Listen buddy boy, you whack me on the head with that cat-gut tennis racket and I'll give you your ball, all right. Both of them. One at a time.
[Bizarre treatment of dogs must be a Democrat tradition. Remember the furor when LBJ picked up his beagles by the ears?--AHM]
"The image of Kennedy in person is even more startling when his white dress shirt is soaked with sweat and he is carrying a bag of dog poop. That was the case on a recent Friday morning as Kennedy hauled himself around the grass near the FDR Memorial. "You've gotta' like a senator who is a pooper picker-upper," says one onlooker, Connie Thompson of Laurel.
"Jim Manley, Kennedy's press secretary, offers to take the bag. But the senator waves him away with his tennis racket. There is principle at stake here, which is more important than a poopless photo op: Kennedy is a figure of larger-than-life personality, achievement and baggage who remains at ease with dirty work, be it in the service of his dogs or a presidential campaign."
The writer sure got that backwards. Five'll getcha' ten Ready Teddy hung on to that bag because it was a poopy photo op. And does "…remains at ease with dirty work…" mean the same as getting down and dirty with a waitress under the table? 'Course at his age he probably can't get it up and dirty anyway.
posted by Harrison at 8:25 PM