Name:Harrison Location:United States

The Original Lovable Little Fuzzball

Here's the straight stuff.

The adventures of Harrison are true.
Try a few of his Crunchy Bites for a taste.
--Alpha Human Mom

Monday, August 02, 2004

Would She or Wouldn't She?

We've been arguing among ourselves about the dog ransom story and whether AHM would shell out $10,000 ransom for any one of us. Aside from the fact she doesn't have $10,000, the consensus vote is yes, yes, maybe, yes, yes. (Heddy's the toss up--she's such a wimp dog. Think Victorian lady with lace hankie and the vapors and you've got her. Drives AHM nuts.) 'Course AHM'd probably call the police first, and be a lot more savvy than Mr. Compton--but then she's not 80-something in human years. And she has a stun gun that she's not afraid to use. I could almost pity the ass that tried something like that.

From ABC: "Compton, meanwhile, says he does not regret shelling out $10,000 to get Sandy back. "It all depends [on] … how much you love something," he said. "

That says it all, especially for older people. One of AHM's neighbors is about Frank Compton's age and used to have a Jack Russell named Bits. Great guy, but getting' up there like his mom. Bits came to visit a lot when his mom went away so we knew him real well. She was always fussin' over him. Just during the six or so years we knew him, I'd guess she spent close to $10,000 on him what with one thing or another. He managed to tear a bunch of ligaments in a hind leg leaping off his deck to chase a fe-lying--a real hero for the cause--with a big vet bill to show for it (and no Purple Heart). Then Bits came down with cancer and, well, that's expensive for human or canine.

So even though she's not that old yet, AHM would figure out somethin' to get one of us back--including tearing the sucker's balls off with her bare hands if necessary. She couldn't stop herself. She's a rescuer person as well as an Alpha--or rather because she's an Alpha. Everyone around here knows it. (Someday I'll tell the story of The Bat that Came to Dinner.) Canines from all over the neighborhood come knockin' on our door if they're out and about when a rainstorm hits. Irritating as hell since I think if they're runnin' loose in a thunderstorm they deserve whatever they get so why do I have to be nice to a directionally challenged Westie or that gallumphing great husky mix. Talk about directionally challenged--he lives just down the street!

Ya' see, Sandy and Frank are family--just like Bits and his mom were family (and all of us, of course). More important, though, they're a pack. The Alpha always takes care of the rest of the pack--human, canine, and yeah, fe-lyin', too. Even Tony Soprano's Family ain't nothin' compared to The Pack.

posted by Harrison at 9:12 AM


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