Name:Harrison Location:United States

The Original Lovable Little Fuzzball

Here's the straight stuff.

The adventures of Harrison are true.
Try a few of his Crunchy Bites for a taste.
--Alpha Human Mom

Thursday, July 14, 2005

Kibbles 'n Bits®

I'm beginnin' to think avian anarchists--'specially sea bird type avians--are as big a menace as fe-lyings. Apparently it's a bunch of dirty birds unleashin' all that pollution on the pristine Arctic and not that nasty acid rain from America.

On the other paw, it sounds like none of these scientists ever left their cars outside within crappin' distance of a tree.

"A major source of chemical contamination in the Arctic turns out to be bird droppings. Wind currents and human activities long have been blamed for fouling the pristine Arctic. But a study by a group of Canadian researchers found that the chemical pollution in areas frequented by seabirds can be many times higher than in nearby regions..."

Think they'll stop blamin' America? Nah. Neither did I.

"Scientists report in Friday's issue of the journal Science that the ponds, which receive falling guano from a colony of northern fulmars that nest on the cliffs, have highly elevated amounts of chemicals...

"[Researcher Jules] Blais calls it the boomerang effect. "These contaminants had been washed into the ocean, where we generally assumed they were no longer affecting terrestrial ecosystems. Our study shows that sea birds, which feed in the ocean but then come back to land, are returning not only with food for their young but with contaminants as well. The contaminants accumulate in their bodies and are released on land," Blais said."

Talk about dirty bombs… 'Course anyone livin' 'round our town could have told 'em that long ago, 'specially durin' mulberry season. Ripe purple mulberry season. Ya' don't leave your car uncovered 'less ya' want it turned into a piece of rollin' abstract art.

Now, as far as ethical conundrums…I'm confused. (No, not about that! I know the difference between those two so get your mind out of the litter pan. Besides, they don't make those other things stretchy enough to fit me.)

Anyway, I thought you humans had decided you and monkeys were pretty much the same anyway--ya' know--that "evolution" business and all--so why are these experiments a bad thing?

"The insertion of human stem cells into monkey brains runs a "real risk" of altering the animals' abilities in ways that might make them more like us, scientists said today.

"A panel of 22 experts -- including primatologists, stem cell researchers, lawyers and philosophers -- debated the possible consequences of the technique for more than a year.

"While the group agrees it is "unlikely that grafting human stem cells into the brains of non-human primates would alter the animals' abilities in morally relevant ways," the members "also felt strongly that the risk of doing so is real and too ethically important to ignore."

No one's admittin' whether experiments goin' in the other direction have been done, but after a quick survey of the Demo-cat Party and a coupla' minutes readin' through the Huff'nPuffPo site, I figure scientists have been at it for years.

And no, I'm not linkin'. You can find lá belle Arianna all on your own.

posted by Harrison at 9:47 PM


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