And a Fe-lyin' in a Kitty Tree

Bein' the Christmas season, even I can't leave out all those fe-lyings litterin' the blogosphere when it comes to findin' useless gifts. 'Course there haven't been many recent sightings of Gracie and Tig, but I'm sure Meryl's busy shoppin' for their Hanukkah gifts. Since Tig's been havin' some anxiety issues, maybe she should consider this:

"The first-ever music CD for cats and their owners! Scientifically tested, recommended by animal psychologists! A special gift for your very best friends!"

Not too sure I'd trust somethin' put together by someone named Prof. Dr. Bubna-Littitz. (Say it out loud and try not to laugh. Sounds like a drunken redneck at a strip club accidentally settin' fire to VaVa vaVoom's tassels.)

Laurence Simon's tribe seems to be into computer controlled toys. It would be interestin' to see if those fe-lyings can figure out how to program this to take out this.

"Revolutionary in design, the Panic Mouse has a built-in computer board that signals a battery-powered motor creating random and unpredictable, "mouse-like" movements."

Now, if we could just make a toy that would encourage Demo-cats to chase Panic Islamists…

Speakin' of Demo-cats… Here's somethin' special that will bring back memories of a former Demo-cat leader. (If we stick one in his mouth do ya' think he'll shut up?)

"Yeowww! Catnip Cigars are 7" long and fully loaded with the best organic catnip available. Filled with 100% organically grown catnip."

Fully loaded, eh? Now why would that remind me of this totally useless gift.

"WJC Talking Doll. This action figure speaks 21 of Bill Clinton's famous quotes."

Maybe not so useless. Actually it's almost worth the $19.92 (yes, that's the listed price) just to find out if he says it.

posted by Harrison at 10:58 PM