Peck, Puff, Poo, and Dogs of the Hare that Bit 'Em

Chicken Run!

"After seeing High Springs [FL] firefighters toting rifles through a neighborhood and shooting at chickens last week, residents said they are infuriated.

"Residents said they were not notified that the shooting would happen, that they worried about the safety of their children and pets, and that firefighters ran through private property without permission. When the shooting was over, residents said they were left to deal with injured chickens and a bloody mess…

So fry 'em up and feed the homeless. Hmmm… Guess that's not an option since most of you were feedin' the little terrors on the sly! But, as usual, when a tough job needs to be done—they bring in the dog.

"After hearing about the events last week, a man from Gilchrist County called officials to tell them that he has a Labrador Retriever rescued after Hurricane Katrina that can catch chickens without injuring them, [Police Chief Ray] Kaminskas said. Officials tested the dog out on Tuesday, Feb. 7, and had positive results, he said."

Diagonally north and west, a different sort of problem was dug up in Washington state.

"Law enforcement officers harvested a dubious record last year — enough marijuana plants to rank the illegal weed as Washington state's No. 8 agricultural commodity, edging out sweet cherries in value."

'Course Washingtonians don't think it's a problem. And you wonder why Starbucks is so popular…

Down the coast, a city deep in the crapper is lookin' at crap to energize things.

"[In dog-friendly San Francisco] animal feces make up nearly 4 percent of residential waste, or 6,500 tons a year… Within the next few months, Norcal Waste, a garbage hauling company that collects San Francisco's trash, will begin a pilot program under which it will use biodegradable bags and dog-waste carts to pick up droppings at a popular dog park.

"The droppings will be tossed into a contraption called a methane digester, which is basically a tank in which bacteria feed on feces for weeks to create methane gas. The methane could then be piped directly to a gas stove, heater, turbine or anything else powered by natural gas. It can also be used to generate electricity."

Now let's see… What can cat poo be used for? Oh yeah. Killin' things!

Good thing Jimmah wasn't drivin' this sled.

"A large and unusually bold hare was apparently so irritated when a dogsled team entered its territory that it went on the attack, in an otherwise peaceful forested area of northern Norway."

He was probably protestin' all those Bugs Bunny cartoons.

"[Wenche Offerdal] told [reporters] that she and her team of huskies met the hare while travelling between Saraelv and Seima Saturday evening… "It was sitting 10 meters from the trail and I figured it would run off, and even that the dogs would go after it," Offerdal said. "I was wrong." Instead, the hare came running towards the dogsled team, which came to a halt. Then the fearless hare jumped right into the middle of team."

Wascally wabbit

"That prompted the lead dog to turn around, which left the hare surrounded by the huskies. The hare's odds worsened when another dogsled came up behind Offerdal's. That left one hare facing 13 dogs. "It was an absurd situation," Offerdal [said]. "The dogs were completely perplexed. The hare stared at them and they stared back, like they were all frozen."

Hausenpfeffer on the hoof—er—paw.

"Suddenly the hare seemed to reconsider its position, and leaped out of the ring, hitting a few of the dogs over their noses with its paws on its way. "It was an enormous leap, the hare landed outside the ring of dogs and ran off into the woods."

Once again flummoxing Elmer, Daffy, Porky, Yosemite and, of course, Jimmy.

posted by Harrison at 9:29 PM